Pudge + Texas Rangers = Happy Me

August 18, 2009

The Dallas Morning News is reporting that the Rangers have pulled off a trade with the Houston Astros to bring Ivan “Pudge” Rodriguez back to the Ballpark. The Rangers were in the market for a veteran catcher after Jarrod Saltalamacchia was placed on the DL with a right arm injury. Pudge can easily be considered the best catcher in the history of the Texas Rangers. It’s not often I get excited about the return of old, well-worn veterans, but this is definitely good news. Welcome back, Pudge!

I’ll update this post with the details of the trade once they come through.

UPDATE: Apparently the Rangers only parted with two minor league prospects for Pudge. That makes this deal all the sweeter.


A Long Look Back At My Week Off

July 6, 2009

Well, I finally pulled the family truckster back into my driveway in Wylie, Texas last night after a long week spent visiting the wife’s family in the Great White North. A lot happened during my time away that needs to be commented on. Plus, I’m going to sprinkle in a few of my own observations from our 2,000 mile round trip trek across the central United States. Here we go…

* I have officially dubbed this to be the Summer of the Dead Has-Been. After arriving at my uncle’s 50th birthday party on Saturday night, the first thing I heard someone say was, “hey, did you hear that they found Steve McNair dead?” Add him to the list along with David Carradine, Ed McMahon, Farrah Fawcett, Michael Jackson, Billy Mays and Karl Malden. If I was Drew Bledsoe or Scott Baio, I’d be staying indoors a lot these days.

* The Texas Rangers closed the gap between themselves and the Anaheim Angels to regain a share of first place in the A.L. West. As I was driving home yesterday, they were in the process of completing a sweep of  a very good Tampa Bay team. Even better, they finally sent Chris Davis and his limp dick of a bat down to Oklahoma City, making Hank Blalock the new everyday first baseman. While Davis was solid defensively, he looked like Corky Thatcher at the plate, hitting a paltry .202 with an ungodly 114 strikeouts. My prediction: Davis will never see the light of day in the big leagues again.

* The Mavericks re-signed Jason Kidd and are about to sign some giant white Pollock. No one seems to care.

Now for some nuggets from the road.

* I spent the greatest four years of my life at Iowa State University. I’ll never have that much fun again. Unfortunately, I had forgotten what an amazing place the campus is until the wife and I swung through Ames on our way up to Minnesota. If you ever get a chance to make it to Ames, do it. Eat at Great Plains Pizza or Hickory Park, drink a beer at Cy’s Roost, laugh at the smelly kids playing Magic in the comic book shop on Lincoln Way and stroll through ISU’s central campus. You won’t be sorry you did.

* I think I offended at least one person in Minnesota when I referred to William Tecumseh Sherman as a bastard. Instead of crying about it like an overly P.C. pussy, you could have just called scoreboard on me. Your side did win that war after all. On a side note, I find it funny that Sherman is such an icon to the “anti-war” left. If the United States military were to employ his tactic of total warfare in Iraq, the anti-war Left would be in an uproar, ready to prosecute every level of the U.S. government for crimes against humanity. We also would have won that war three months after it started, but that’s another story. But you have to remember that nothing gets a peace-loving, anti-war hippie more excited than the thought of killing his fellow Americans, which is exactly what Sherman did. Don’t believe me? Ask the first anti-war peacenik you come across what his thoughts are on the Iraq War. I’m sure you know what his response will be. Next, ask that same hippie douche what he thinks about Texas (or any other red state in the south) seceding from the Union. Watch as his pants tighten at the thought of the Obama-led U.S. military marching south to teach those no good, free thinkers a bloody and well-deserved lesson.

* Lakes in central Minnesota are freezing fucking cold even in July. I don’t recommend jumping in one.

* Why is the simple act of driving so tiring? Granted, I drove almost 1,000 miles yesterday, but I still didn’t think I was going to be that exhausted when I finally got home. I mean, it is just sitting in a chair and using your hands and one foot, right? Maybe it’s more mental exhaustion from driving around countless morons who refuse to go five miles over the speed limit and who change lanes without looking.

* And on that note: Fuck you, Oklahoma. Die.

Apparently Good Things Were Amiss In Arlington Last Night

April 16, 2009

Does it reflect poorly on the state of baseball in the DFW area when I’ve been trolling local media and sports sites all morning and I just now came across this story.

Apparently, not only did the Rangers beat the Orioles 19-6 last night, second baseman Ian Kinsler hit for the cycle, becoming just the fourth Ranger to ever do so.

I’m sure the tens of hundreds of fans at the Ballpark last night relished the opportunity to witness history. Kind of.

Today Is A Big Day?

February 14, 2009

If you are a baseball purist or just a fan of the game, it’s a big day for you. The season is officially getting underway with pitchers and catchers reporting to spring training today. The rest of the players can report on February 17th. Wake me up in October.

Jerrod’s Best Week Ever?

November 13, 2008

It’s been a pretty good week for ol’ Jerrod. On Tuesday, his Cowboys vs. Major League post was picked up by Sports Illustrated’s Hot Clicks page (second item down). In 24 hours, that link brought more than 7000 readers to Homers, completely shattering any and all traffic records we previously had.

Keep up the good work, holmes.

Defense Is A Four-Letter Word In Dallas

October 31, 2008

The 08-09 Dallas Mavericks got their season started last night with about as much veracity as a limp dick. Despite hanging in for a good three quarters, the Mavs fell apart in the fourth to fall 112-102 to the Houston Rockets. Offensively, the team looked good. Dirk poured in 36, Howard had 28 and Kidd finished with 12 assists. They ran the floor well like Rick Carlisle said they would, though that dropped off quite a bit whenever the incredibly sub-par bench got involved.

What was noticeably absent all game was any sort of defensive presence. This is a Houston team that scored a grand total of 82 points a couple of nights ago against Memphis. MEMPHIS!! However, the Mavs managed to go out and make Yao Ming (30 points, 13 boards) look like Hakeen Olajuwon in his prime, and they let Ron Artest (29 points, 7 boards) run roughshot all over the court for the entire game. Better yet, Tracy McGrady didn’t even play in the fourth quarter and the Rockets still outscored the Mavs by 11 to clinch the victory.

Which brings me to main point: Why is the concept of defense so foreign to all of our local sports teams? The Cowboys suit up a defensive unit stacked with number one draft picks and high-priced free agents, yet they can make the Rams offense, arguably the worst in football, look reminiscent of the Greatest Show on Turf. Through eight games, they’ve managed to intercept two passes. The Stars, who are currently sitting at 4-4-2, have allowed a league worst 40 goals through 10 games. Everytime Marty Turco looks up, three members of the opposing team are bearing down on him as Sean Avery jerks it to a picture of himself. The 2008 version of the Texas Rangers managed to commit more errors and have a lower fielding percentage than every other team in the Major Leagues.

What ever happened to the credo that defense wins championships? Is that just something that coaches tell you during high school basketball practice so that the two kids with talent won’t dominate all of practice with their shooting skills? Or has the glitz-and-glam image of life and sports in Dallas gotten so pervasive that our athletes feel like they don’t need to do any of the “grunt” work?

Whatever the root cause is somebody needs to pull an Oscar Rogers and FIX IT!

You take it one step at a time:

1. Identify the problem. FIX IT!

2. Identify another problem. FIX IT!

3. Repeat as necessary until it’s all FIXED!

Will The Real Milton Bradley Please Stand Up?

June 12, 2008

After almost half a season of nothing but stellar on-the-field production, Milton Bradley finally let his true colors shine through in Kansas City. Apparently, Bradley didn’t take too kindly to criticisms directed his way by Royals television announcer Ryan Lefebvre. I’m just disappointed that he didn’t make it into the booth with Lefebvre. I lived in K.C. for two years and I can tell you that dude sucks. What kind of suspension would Bradley have received for choking out an announcer?