December 27, 2007
Hey guys! I know, I know…. it’s been a long time since you’ve seen anything new here. I think you can attribute that to the busy holiday season. Everyone has had a full schedule of family engagements, last minute shopping and finishing up those pesky end-of-the-year work projects. Anyway, it’s time we got back to the business of bringing you the opinions you’ve been dying to hear.
I’ll get things started by pointing you in the direction of this editorial from The New York Times, or as I like to call it, The Pretentious and Condescending View from our East Coast Ivory Tower. Apparently us poor, backwards Texans need to catch up with the rest of the country and stop sending murderers and rapists to the firey Hell pit where they belong. We really should be more like progressive New Jersey with their obnoxious Guido culture and their closeted, gay governors.
I just find it funny that the same newspaper that will support the extermination of innocent babies at any cost will also go out of its way to see that the dregs of our society are ensured the right to life.
So let me get this straight:
Innocent baby who never asked to be conceived, never caused any ills in the world and is completely harmless deserve to die.
Man who murders entire family while they sleep deserves to live.
I just don’t get it.
December 11, 2007
In case you missed it, ESPN yuck monkey Kenny Mayne gave us this bit of hilarity prior to the Cowboys/Lions game this past Sunday. Dallas has an assistant head coach, Tony Sparano, whose name is awfully similar to America’s favorite fictional mob boss, Tony Soprano. This take on the final episode of the Sopranos is even more fitting because it pairs Tony Romo and his favorite band, Journey.
December 7, 2007
John Madden was in New England to announce a football game one weekend when he noticed a special telephone near the Patriot’s bench. He asked QB Tom Brady what it was used for and was told it was a hotline to God. John asked if he could use it. Brady replied, “Sure, but it will cost you $200.”
John scratched his head, then thought “what the heck, I could use some help picking games.” He pulled out his wallet and paid the $200. John’s picks were perfect that week.
The next week, John was in Indianapolis when he noticed that same kind of phone on the Colts’ bench. He asked what the telephone was for and Peyton Manning told him, “It’s a hotline to God. If you want to use it, it will cost you $500.”
Recalling the previous week, John pulled out his wallet and made the call. Again, John’s picks were perfect that week.
Last weekend, John was in Dallas when he noticed the same kind of telephone by the Cowboys’ bench. He asked Tony Romo, “Is that the hotline to God?”
Romo said, “Yes, it is and if you want to use it, it will cost you 50 cents.”
John looked incredulously at Romo and said,”Wait a second! I just paid $200 in New England and $500 in Indianapolis to use the same phone to God! Why do the Cowboys only charge 50 cents?”
Romo replied, “Because in Dallas, it’s a local call!”
Welcome to God’s Country!